The #AskASocerPro show is a Live video podcast where 11 year MLS vet and Mental Strength Coach Quincy Amarikwa dives into the mentalities of highly successful individuals both on and off the pitch. In this weeks episode Quincy Amarikwa and Mariah Lee discussed about What experiences have helped Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) develop her mentality? How much does music affect Mariah Lee? How is Quincy connecting to female activists and more.
0:00-2:40 Get a dive into the life and experiences of Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) with the #AskASoccerPro Show Ep 108
2:41-6:25 Do you know all of Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) accomplishments?
6:26-8:17 How does Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) approach life and create her own version of the mental strength league.
8:18-10:06 What experiences have helped Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) develop her mentality?
10:07-14:27 At what times is Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) a fighter, vs a nerd?
15:00-16:20 Has Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) ever had days where she thought she could not do it? @san_jose_earthquake_memes
16:21-18:13 How does Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) get through difficult parts of training and games.
19:39-20:44 How has it been for Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) settling down in Scotland during the lockdowns? @liamtennant91
20:45-22:06 How much does music affect Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) during pre games? @graham.wav
22:07-24:45 Does Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) prefer scoring or assisting more? @san_jose_earthquakes_memes
24:46-28:35 What is the most important item that Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) wants to give back to the game?
28:36-31:11 What things does Mariah Lee think (@merdashewrote) will help grow women’s football?
31:20-33:51 What teammates have given Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) the best advice? @liam91
34:00-35:32 What has Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) biggest achievements been on and off the field. @gingsean
35:33-39:02 What is undeniable about Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) approach to getting signed?
39:51-42:05 Was Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) nervous when she had her first professional debut.
42:06-46:14 What is Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote) looking forward to the most in the future?
46:15-50:35 How is Quincy connecting to female activists and players to bring the MLS and NWSL together?
50:36-53:55 What are the best ways to stay connected to Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote)
53:56-56:17 That is a wrap on the 108th episode of the #AskASoccerPro Show featuring Mariah Lee (@merdashewrote)
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*Transcript is unedited and machine-generated. There will be errors. For further clarity please refer to the audio or video.
Quincy Amarikwa (00:00):
We're all here to ride the MSL waves. You've mentioned the strength lead. I'd like to welcome you to another episode of the hashtag ask eight soccer pro [inaudible].
Quincy Amarikwa (00:12):
We are live Connor Johnson. First one in what's going on, brother. How you doing Mariah? Oh, you already joined it in, uh, so I'll give, okay. We'll get going into it right away. Mariah. I'll just, I'll buzz you in, in just a moment so we can get going in when we're welcoming to everybody, you know, go through the intro, uh, PO uh, dropping them in your head. Emojis, Joe Jackson, um, said, what about McNasty joining in, uh, what up everybody? So let's hop into it. Cause our special guests of honor has already joined in. So I'm excited for today's episode. You guys already see what's up on the screen. Um, but let's jump in. So welcome to another episode of the hashtag asking soccer pro show episode one Oh eight. I'm your host? 12 year pro MLS cup champion, MLS comeback player of the year, UC Davis hall of fame member, black players for change founder in MSL, coach coinci America.
Quincy Amarikwa (01:09):
And today we'll be joined by who you're seeing on the screen, their special guests, Mariah Lee. But before we get into all of that fun stuff for today, you may be asking yourself, what is the MSL? Well, that is what we're here to discuss and break down every Thursday, 6:00 PM, PST 9:00 PM EST over here, live on the app. Perfect underscore soccer, Instagram account, trapped in mind and your head emojis. If you guys know what it is and what's going on and what it is, uh, it's the mental strength league. You guys know what it is. Uh, I'm in your head, um, in your head, uh, for those of you who are just tuning into this hashtag frequency, it is a mental 40 game of chess where you are either an active participant or you are a pawn in the game state of getting played. So for those of you who might be wanting to know what the MSL is, it is the mindset you need to accomplish your goals.
Quincy Amarikwa (02:05):
Why should you have this? Why should you have this mindset? So you can learn how to learn, why learn, how to learn so you can learn and know how, and when you are stopping yourself from achieving your goals and what to do about it, when does this mindset start? The moment you decide to take responsibility, responsibility for where you are, even if where you are, isn't your fault and put forth a plan to learn what you need to, to continue forward. So if you guys are ready for today's episode and today's guest, I'm super juiced to be buzzing in here right now, start button, drop them on in your head emojis so we can see what it is and, uh, Hey, Hey, how you doing?
Quincy Amarikwa (02:47):
Thanks for having me. Thanks. We're glad to have you thanks for showing up. And uh, I think we're going to have a lot of fun today here and before we kind of kicked it off into everything I wanted to give, uh, you put together a great bio for me to read and I want to make sure I'm hitting it perfectly. So if I'm missing anything, please let me know. Um, before we get started, but Brian Lee is an athlete advocate, nerd and fighter. I like that. I like the fighting nerds. That's that jumped out from a professional soccer player at Celtic FC women in the Scottish women's premier league has played professional soccer in Switzerland, as well as for the, uh, as well as us for hometown T w O rain. Am I saying that correctly? This past summer? Oh, well rain. Okay. Uh, during the NWSL challenge cup, Maria is also a wake forest school of business and Stanford alum, part of the 2017 NCAA championship team with the card separate. Okay. Mariah, Mariah, I'm saying, am I saying Maria? Did I say
Quincy Amarikwa (04:01):
Quincy Amarikwa (04:03):
No. Okay. No, that's a great way to kick off the show, correct? The host. I liked that. I liked that energy because here we talk about the MSL. You heard a little bit of the spill there. Uh, we encourage making mistakes here. That's how you learn. Um, you got to try, you're going to make mistakes. You're going to look stupid and that's, that's part of the process. Um, as long as we've got a growth mindset, we're open to learning from those mistakes and apologizing for those. I'm sorry. I missed pronouncing your name. Um, Mariah, but right. Uh, I'm sure we'll, we'll get into a lot more here, uh, as it gets going. Um, I guess first and foremost, would you maybe give us, uh, I know I shared a little bit of a bio, um, uh, about you. Is there anything else you'd like to share or highlight or, um, where are you at in the world? Like, how are you doing as a human, like, you know, like where are you calling in from?
Quincy Amarikwa (04:56):
Yeah. So I'm here in Scotland. So it's currently 1:06 AM. So I'm a little tired, um, by, I got here being in January and then they shut down the country. So, um, like two days after I got here. Um, so this is our second week into training camp. Um, and yeah, and just getting acquainted with the girls and starting on a new team and all the challenges that come with that. So, um, yeah, it's fresh,
Quincy Amarikwa (05:30):
Fresh start. Okay. Okay. I like that. This is a true MSL mentality. Look at that. Another country shut down one o'clock in the morning and you still show up, you still show up and see everyone spam the heart button, because that's what we're about here. I love, I love that. That's when you saw a huge smile because I'm not, I'm not smiling. You know, I understand that's a difficult situation. That's not necessarily, you know, the greatest space to be in, but challenging yourself and being willing to get uncomfortable is what's necessary for growth. And, uh, I think you, you just entering in the conversation under those circumstances is, is a huge positive. I, I love that and I know our community does as well too. So I think that'd be a great segue kind of is that, would you say that that's who you are, that's just how you approach the game, how you approach life. Um, and if, if, if not, uh, why, why approaching it? Why approach it that way? And if so, like how did you kind of develop that, that approach and that mentality?
Quincy Amarikwa (06:46):
Yeah. I, um, can't remember a time when I didn't really have this like growth mentality, this mentality that, you know, there are going to be challenges in life and you have to like find a way to overcome. And I think it's just kind of ingrained in me, ingrained into me and my parents were athletes. And so I just kinda was brought up with this other mindset and it's helped me succeed and get to this level. So I bring it all the time.
Quincy Amarikwa (07:13):
I love that. So what, what have you felt is the most, um, what's the most valuable lesson or perspective that you, that you focus on when approaching any new challenge or, or what we call here? Temporary obstacles?
Quincy Amarikwa (07:31):
Um, Oh, the most, the one thing, um, that's tough, but probably, um, just being resilient and like kind of having a long-term focus and not letting the small things kind of set you back and just like knowing that that's part of your overall growth in that. Even if you have like a step back right now that can help you in the future and you can take a bunch of strides and just not dwelling on the little stuff.
Quincy Amarikwa (08:07):
Okay. Now, now you, now you sound like a veteran. Okay. So now you're dropping some veteran knowledge on, on, uh, on the audience here. Now that's something you earn and learn through experience, right? So what, what is kind of an experience you've had, that's led you to have that optimistic outlook, right? Looking at those difficult moments as a step back for two steps forward.
Quincy Amarikwa (08:35):
I mean, I been injured on my ACL, done other knee things had times when I wasn't playing, you know, times when I was playing. So all of those things just kind of teach you lessons and, um, just like patience is one and like, um, having grit and like, you know, just knowing when to push through and knowing when to like actually take some time to rest and reflect. So I just kind of pick those up along the way through various obstacles.
Quincy Amarikwa (09:17):
Okay. For me what I'm hearing, right. I'm hearing that, uh, and correct me if I'm wrong. You're someone who definitely learns lessons the hard way you got to kind of, you gotta, you gotta go. You gotta, no, one's gonna tell you nothing, but you'll tell yourself because you're your greatest critic. Would that be accurate?
Quincy Amarikwa (09:40):
I mean, I, I listen to, and like try to avoid things, but some things you don't really know unless they happen to you firsthand and you're in it. Like there's a difference between hearing other people talk and then experiencing it yourself and knowing what works best for you.
Quincy Amarikwa (09:57):
Yes. I, I very much, uh, resonate with that and understand that. And I think I asked that question because I wanted to get to the point on in terms of nerd and fighter, right. Those two things that stands out to me. Right. And the approach seems fighter, I'm willing to fight because if that's necessary, we're here, let's do that. And I think that energy is necessary, especially at the professional level. Right. But you had also mentioned the word patience. Right. And that kind of leads more towards maybe the nerd side. Right. Uh, being more reserved. So how have you found how to balance between the two when's the right time to be the fighter and when's the right time to be the nerd?
Quincy Amarikwa (10:47):
Um, well, on the field a hundred percent of the time, I'm a fighter. Just like there's no, there's no space to be passive on the field. Um, when I'm in it and I'm playing, um, I think when you are off the field and reflecting on your game, um, it'll pay dividends. If you do your due diligence and you study and you, um, reflect and you really take a critical look at what you're doing and like what went into your performance and even outside of strictly soccer, just soaking up knowledge and, uh, while you're dancing various things.
Quincy Amarikwa (11:39):
No, I think we lost you a little bit. There you back. Yeah. I'm here. Okay. We lost you a little bit there, but I I've heard, I've heard, um, had heard in terms of the self-reflection at the, at the end there. And, um, it was interesting cause Graham who's in the comments as well, too. Uh, as well, he had said, this is the mental refresh. Uh, I was in need of so loving that or let's see if we, I don't know. All right. So while we're waiting. Oh, okay. I think she got dropped from the drop, from the track chat. What's going on up welcome brother. Uh, while we wait on her to join back in, we'll get another one up on the screen here. Choose different nurse.
Quincy Amarikwa (12:43):
Uh, if you guys got any questions for Mariah, please drop them in the chat box so we can ask her, uh, poke with it. Wasn't ready for the frequency is, Hey, it's high levels out here. We got to reconnect to the network. You guys know we're out here. Um, uh, download map info into the cloud, that mental software update for the, for the universe. Okay. We've got her back in here. You guys got some questions, make sure you're dropping them down in the, uh, in the chat box or in the community area. Let me get plugged back in. Okay.
Quincy Amarikwa (13:27):
Sorry, not that
Quincy Amarikwa (13:28):
All good. All good. Um, we, we cut off there when you're talking about self-reflection and um, I just,
Quincy Amarikwa (13:46):
Um, yeah, just the end of my thought. I was just saying that I'm bringing, you know, like your brain to things off the field and just soaking up knowledge will only help you in anything you do. Even outside of soccer, just kind of soaking up and learning and having that mindset will just pay dividends throughout your career and beyond.
Quincy Amarikwa (14:11):
I love that. It touched into what you said before. We, we, we discuss here the LTW M which is long-term winners mindset, and you're, you're already speaking a lot to that in terms of the, you know, one step back for two steps forward. Um, uh, yeah, shout out the ruler joined in and said, uh, said what's up, uh, ASP flowers joined in as well to you. Um, I see one, five, six, seven, nine, six. I always remember hers because, uh, in her bio she's got future billionaire and that stood out to me. Yeah. And I, I liked that. I liked that energy. Uh, she said what's up and we've got some questions that are starting to come in for you specifically. Um, Oh, I think I just scroll back back. Okay. So Sam underscores, Jose underscore earthquakes, underscore meme said asked, uh, uh, Mariah has, has there ever been tough days where you think I can't do this?
Quincy Amarikwa (15:13):
Hmm. Um, I don't, there's been things where it's been tough and I've been pretty close to like, maybe is this the right decision in questioning it? But I don't think I've gotten to the point where I have thought to myself, I can't do it. But, um, yeah, there are definitely tough days. And you got to go back to like the why behind what you're doing. And, um, for me, it's, cause I love soccer and soccer brings me joy. And if I stop having fun, then I'll stop playing. Like for me, I'm not gonna do something that I'm not loving. If I have to do this every day and grind and sweat and run the beep test here, the beep test today. So, you know, like I'm doing it. Cause I love it.
Quincy Amarikwa (16:02):
I liked that. I don't love the beep test hate that. I really like the, but you realize it's usually like mandatory and part of the process. So for the parts that you hate or you don't like, maybe, maybe you're not as a, maybe you don't like dislike the B test as much as I can make this. Right. But like, for those parts of the game that you don't love, like how do you get through that? Like what is it that you focus on there and, and yeah, in those moments,
Quincy Amarikwa (16:33):
Uh, Ooh, I think just seeing the value it brings. So I know the plans, isn't great, but like being fit is part of the game. And especially when you play forward and you're a winger, like you're going to run all the time. So, um, I have to prove to my coaches that they can trust me. They can count on me to be able to like run down the sideline, like a zillion times in the game. And also I just think of fitness as a mental toughness exercise. And like, if I can battle through that, I can battle through anything on the field. So, um, you just gotta look at the positives.
Quincy Amarikwa (17:12):
I love that a lot. What w what you made me go to, uh, in my mind was, and I talked about it on the show a lot, uh, for being a pro player for over 12 years, I dislike running. I've never enjoyed it ever, like, but that's like required. Right. And, uh, it has never gotten easier for me, but to your point, I see the value in it. And earlier today I was on my run and I was getting to that point that you're talking about where it's like, man, why am I like, why am I doing this? Like, I don't even know. And then you pushed through and I got to the other side and I went, okay, all right, well, I've been here before. I know this moment I know will pass. Uh, but it only passes if you keep moving forward. So I love, I love that, um, the core value, we talked about yourself, honesty, and I love how you were purchasing.
Quincy Amarikwa (18:04):
Like, Hey, I haven't gotten to a point where I said I can't do it, but I have gotten to a point where I got to remember why. And, uh, no, that's, that's awesome. We're seeing a lot of people, uh, the people dropping in some stuff. So Graham dot wave down in your head emojis and put the LTW M yes, sir. Cause he knows all about that. He's loving your long-term motors mindset here. Uh, Liam, T E N N a N T 91. It said, love this guys. And then I think gave us a little bit of St. Patty's day. Uh, green, green love here. I put sound sick. Oh, Oh, well, is it, wasn't it St. Patrick's day? Is it today or yesterday or when was it? I don't know. I don't know. I, uh, I didn't realize it was like daylight savings and then, um, and then, uh, that, that messed me all up as well, too.
Quincy Amarikwa (19:02):
So yeah. Um, let me see. We've got here. Oh, okay. So, okay. So let's, let's stuff coming in now, uh, AC AC flatter said, ha ha. You do hate running. So that's one of my friends. We went to college together at UC Davis. So like he definitely, he definitely knows, uh, that hasn't changed. Um, I think we had some more specific questions. Okay. Um, so I know you had said you just recently got out, uh, to Celtic and, and you know, the, the country kind of shut down, but, uh, Liam, T N N a N T 91, a DAS, how's it been settling in to Scotland under lockdown, uh, must be hard times, but, uh, maybe, you know, if you'd want to share a little bit about how w how has that kind of experience been, what were you thinking it would be versus what it's kind of been so far and how are you dealing with that?
Quincy Amarikwa (20:02):
Yeah. Um, now it's better because we can train, but for the first bit we couldn't train. You only could leave with people in your household. So it was me and like one or two other girls, we'd go out by herself every day and just do our own training to prepare for the season. So, um, that wasn't ideal. Um, but, you know, I can work on things I want to work on and part of my game that, um, I want to focus on. So it was good to have that focus, but also I was getting a little antsy waiting around to start training.
Quincy Amarikwa (20:39):
I understand, I understand that, that itch to get back to the game. Um, okay. Graham had said Graham, that wave had asked, does music play a, uh, a part in elevating pregame motivation, or should it not influence you that much?
Quincy Amarikwa (20:57):
Oh, I think it depends on the person. I, um, have like the same playlist. I listened to a bunch of oldies. Um, and I actually use music to calm myself. I don't like getting too amped up, so I kinda like just like the calming aspect, um, to settle my nerves. Uh, so I guess it's just kind of finding what works for you. If you want to get hyped up, you want to calm down or, you know, the vibe you're looking for.
Quincy Amarikwa (21:29):
I love that. So what, uh, what is, uh, what's kind of your go-to, um, saw, do you have a song, an artist, a mood, like what's, what's your, what's the first one? You're, you're opening it up.
Quincy Amarikwa (21:44):
Uh, um, I mean, I don't know, like I just have a whole playlist. Um, so yeah, it just depends on the day, but like, I dunno. I dunno.
Quincy Amarikwa (21:58):
Okay. So that's all right. So that's the only question that's stumped you so far on the chair. I liked that. Um, okay, so we got, uh, so San Jose earthquakes memes had asked, uh, do you enjoy scoring more or assisting more?
Quincy Amarikwa (22:17):
Um, I like both. I think, um, soaring feels good. Assistant feels good. That's a tough question. You can even throw in drawing PKS. I like doing that too.
Quincy Amarikwa (22:30):
Yeah. That's an under-age of one. I love that one.
Quincy Amarikwa (22:33):
Yeah. Um, I mean, a really nice assist is good. Cause then the other person's like you did that, not me. Uh, like they know they're like, dang, like if it's just like, you know, they really cool and they just like easy tap it and then just like, that's nice too. Um, but like a banger is like, you can't beat a banger. I don't know. What do you think?
Quincy Amarikwa (22:56):
Oh, scoring our assisting. Um, I think, um, for me assisting, assisting, I like, I enjoy assisting more, even the, the, the experience you're talking about when, when the other person has to look at you and be like, yeah, like you practically scored that if those plays are coming to you, but I'm getting the credit and it's like, yeah, I want it. I want that. I want that step. I want them to know I would've scored that goal without you. And you'd be like, yeah, no, but it's okay. Go ahead. Get the [inaudible]. Uh, yeah, I love that. Now, if we go real deep, I like the second assist, the third assist, the fourth assist. I like to, I like to see how far back from the final product you could be influential in the outcome. Yeah. But what I,
Quincy Amarikwa (24:00):
Okay. And that kind of relates to go ahead. I was going to say about your posts. I saw your post and that kind of relates.
Quincy Amarikwa (24:09):
Yes. Yes. Like that's the, yeah, that's the, that's where I felt, I found the most fun for me. That was my creative space. You know, it's almost like you can't be seen as well too, which is, you know, that ties down to probably a lot of the experiences I've had over the course of my time playing, you know, in soccer there's certain times that you don't want to be seen cause it doesn't necessarily pan out to positively for you. Right. Um, yeah. So now this is, I appreciate that. That's how, you know, it's self-reflecting and we're talking about self-reflection and how you learn and what the experience has been like for over the course of your career. What have you, what have you felt is what, okay. So in the same vein of like assisting versus scoring, right? I feel like just our conversation is like assisting the audience in the future when they run into you use or problems or temporary obstacles, you know, however they define it for themselves. And I see this, this opportunity, this, this platform, this game we're playing, right? Uh, uh, mental chess, 40 chess. And in tapping into our experiences to, to kind of give, uh, uh, open up space and access to the audience to participate.
Quincy Amarikwa (25:39):
What, what do you feel is the most important or valuable thing to give back to the game that you love? Right. Like you, you love this game. You've been in it. You, you you've got a lot from it, but it's also taken a lot from you. It's taken your ACL, right. It's taken time, effort, you know, parties, friendships, you know what I mean? Like there's a lot that goes into that people don't understand. So like for you, what, what makes you want to give back?
Quincy Amarikwa (26:07):
Um, I just, I, I feel like in just all aspects of my life, I'm like, how can I help other people? And like, how can my experience just shed some light that they need, or they might in the future, like, um, just, just any way that, um, I can just help other people. And I think like through soccer, sharing my experiences, if someone can clean a lesson or like, you know, even held their, or like fighting, you know, through other things outside of the sport. Um, and just have a positive, like life in general. Um, you know, that is something I always look to do my favorite part. I was doing some individual training and doing that on my off time. And, um, my favorite kid is like the kid who is like kind of shy and then there's like a baller and like, you know, they just love it. And I just get him, bring it out of him. I just get like, bring that out. And like, those kids, like, I'll train you for free. I don't even care. Like, it's the ones when, you know, their parents were, you know, they don't want to be there on this leg, but like those caves have that like little internal drive that I can just help blossom. Like, that's my favorite part about the sport?
Quincy Amarikwa (27:34):
That's no, it's, uh, it's amazing. There's so many different things that you can fall in love with about the game. Right. And, um, it's cool to hear the things that light you up, right? The things that inspire you, things that motivate you, uh, you know, it's cool. It's good to hear. Cause you can, you can hear it in your voice. You can see, even when you're talking about it, you know, it's just like, Oh, you know, figuring out how to bring out the best in people I think is patient. And it, it, uh, what stands out to me as well too, is, uh, uh, Maria Lee has got me, uh, Oh, sorry. Mariah. I keep saying Maria, right. Sorry. I'm sorry. Mariah Lee has got me wanting to watch women's football now. Love it. Great person. So that's what brings me
Quincy Amarikwa (28:30):
Watch women's football. Yes.
Quincy Amarikwa (28:33):
There we go. Oh, okay. Uh, in that same vein, which has been, which has been great. So we've been developing more of a relationship with the black women's players collective yeah. Over, uh, you know, over the last several months, especially in the mini pitch initiative and, and, and stuff. And I've been, I've been able to listen in on a lot of panels and a lot of, you know, black women sharing their experiences. Um, and what's been good, but also what definitely hasn't been the greatest and what can, how to, how to improve. I think one thing was, was definitely talking to you, how to bridge the gap of creating more opportunity for people to become fans of the, of the, of the female game of, to participate and to, and to watch what are, what are some things that you feel can be done to help, to help in that? Like,
Quincy Amarikwa (29:33):
Um, well, you can start with like TV contracts, you know, something like that. Um, uh, interview sell from lifetime last season, uh, to CBS sports, but it was a paid subscription model. Like just getting us on TV, um, where it's free for people to watch with like the basic cable channels. Like don't make people jump through hoops to watch them and soccer. Um, I think everybody has seen how entertaining and how good we are and look at the world cup and all the stats on ratings and even the stats that came out about the interview itself, um, this past summer, like I think they were one of the few leagues that their viewership skyrocketed. So, um, I think people want to watch soccer and sometimes we're just not in the limelight and we don't get a lot of media attention. So people, um, aren't reminded about us, you know, if you scroll through ESPN, we're not on there. Like why is that? You know? So I think there can be a lot done to highlight women's sports across the board.
Quincy Amarikwa (30:40):
I love that. And, uh, we're seeing a lot of, a lot of, uh, people saying, uh, love your love, your posts on your account. Let's go. Um, the women's game is only going up. That's a fact, um, Liam had said checking women's champions league is superb. Just have to look at Leon in France. Um, let's see. Oh, I think this is a good question. I like this one. Um, so I was just scrolling back through because I know everyone's been dropping a bunch of love and saying that they're loving what you're sharing and taking away from the conversation. Um, but okay. What teammates have given you the, uh, Liam Liam 91 and ask what teammates have given the best advice to you, uh, to you, both, but for you?
Quincy Amarikwa (31:36):
Um, I've had a lot of good teammates. Um, the best advice, I think my freshman year, um, going into like my sophomore year, I thought I, that was like the best soccer I played, like coming off season, like off season. I like soccer. I get into my eval, my coach. And he just like obliterates me. And I came out just like, I wasn't expecting that. How do you feel like you improved? Like you just like obliterated me. And so I was upset. And then I was talking to one of the seniors on the team. She Alma she's at, um, real Madrid. And, um, she was like, Oh, he's just saying that to motivate you. And that clicked in my head. And I was like, Oh, you couldn't be on to something like, you couldn't be on to something. And so like now, like I don't take everything that coaches say at face value. Like sometimes saying this to like, get a reaction out of you. Sometimes they want to motivate you, you know, they don't ever want you to be complacent and you know, like they have criticism, they have feedback, but like, if you know, you're killing it and then they say something, otherwise it'd be like, I think they're trying to motivate me to be better. A good thought. I love that. That's true.
Quincy Amarikwa (33:03):
True, Ms. Selling right there. That's like, wait. So we talked about it here with the, with the, I mean your head emojis, we take, uh, positive energy, we'll take negative energy and we turn it and convert it into positive energy. We take positive energy and use that to continue to elevate us. Right. So it's, it's even if the intention in the criticism isn't necessarily to motivate you, you can still use that criticism as motivation. So there's, there's no excuse as to you, uh, uh, as to, as to how you can take the feedback. Good, bad indifferent, and, um, and build a mindset mentality that helps propel you forward. So I, I love, I love that. I love your approach. It's uh, it's amazing. Um, let's yeah, we're seeing a bunch of people's spam in the spam of the heart button here. Uh, cause they were loving that as well too. Um, let's see. Okay. G, G I N G Sean S S okay.
Quincy Amarikwa (34:09):
Quincy Amarikwa (34:10):
I love that. It's always the best cause you jumping into this, you're like, I don't know anybody in any of these screen names and stuff. I'll just be reading some random stuff. That's great. Okay. So they had asked, uh, proudest personal achievement and proudest athletic achievement.
Quincy Amarikwa (34:28):
Um, I mean personal achievement, um, probably graduating from Stanford. Um, that was a proud moment and it was on father's day and I was a proud moment. Um, and then on the fields, um, I think making the rain actually. Yeah, cause that was like a turning point because I was on this Swiss team that no one has ever heard of. And then I, uh, went on trial with the rain and I made the team. So there was no like, come here with the contract sign is like, come here and just proving. And so yeah, I, I showed out and got signed, so that was probably the best soccer moment.
Quincy Amarikwa (35:27):
Got it. So you got the job done is what you saying? Hashtag Brett
Quincy Amarikwa (35:36):
Quincy Amarikwa (35:38):
Okay. I like that. What about it? What do you, what was it that you got done? Right? Cause it's, it's a, it's a completely different and I'm gonna, I'm gonna gas you up even more so, so it's a completely different exactly. It's a completely different, uh, level of achievement to have to enter into space where people aren't even expecting you to show them anything that would compel them to sign you. So you already have a whole bunch of stuff you've got to overcome to even be considered. So, so if you're showing up and you still figure out a way to get the job done and get signed, there's something that's undeniable, right? Yeah. Okay. So what, what do you believe? What do you believe was undeniable about that approach? Like what do you believe was what was getting the job? What did you do? What was it?
Quincy Amarikwa (36:35):
Um, that's when the ma like my mindset really like, say me because they don't know you, they don't care about you. Like I wasn't on anybody's radar. Um, you know, we would barely get time. It would be some days like I would just be playing defense as a forward, you know? And so, um, I just was always working are just like head down, just like, wait. And if my opportunity comes, I'm going to take advantage of it. And, um, like saving graces when we play Leslie 11, like we don't have a gazillion numbers, so I'm going to get time. I just knew that eventually I will get time. Um, and so we had like three or four scrimmages, um, leading up to the tournament and those are like the moments where everyone's fighting for their spot. And sometimes the teams would be sacks. I'm going against the starting line.
Quincy Amarikwa (37:30):
I like that better than being with the starting team. Um, a lot of the times is like being with the non-starters because then they can't deny it. If you're going by the starters, like if you're going by the non-starters, I'd be like, well, you know, but going against them, I just consistently, like I scored a goal, drew a PK, scored another goal, like I think, yeah, three out of the four scrimmages, like I made something happen. And so then they just had designed me. Like, they, they couldn't, it wasn't a fluke. You keep doing it. I would love to just getting lucky.
Quincy Amarikwa (38:08):
Quincy Amarikwa (38:10):
But I really had to push them. Cause there were some times like me and the other girls would look at each other, like, are we going to get in? And they, some girls would get down and I'm like, well, this is 84 discriminated. So I don't get in. I just have more energy than everybody else tomorrow. Like you gotta kind of look at it,
Quincy Amarikwa (38:28):
Optimistic, tell him again. Oh, we might not play today. Oh yeah. But what does that mean? I'm just going to be hampered. You have more energy tomorrow then. So they're just helping me out above that stress.
Quincy Amarikwa (38:46):
Quincy Amarikwa (38:48):
Listen, you just speak in facts out here. I'm just making sure that the microphone is working. That's all just in case people fell asleep, you know? Cause sometimes people can, can fall asleep on us. You know, we gotta, we gotta remind them.
Quincy Amarikwa (39:02):
Quincy Amarikwa (39:06):
Okay. Uh, yeah. Okay. Got a lot of people spam that heart button. Now they're loving that. Cause that's just, that's the mentality. That's what it is in a nutshell, not now then later, if not later, than later after that, if not, it's gonna it's happening and you just gotta be ready for when your time comes. And I love, I love that your time will come. You will get your opportunity. But when that time comes, you can't spend your time talking about, well, I'm not ready because you know, you didn't tell me it was too late. It's gone. Then, then it's too late. So I love that Liam had dropped a hashtag winning mentality. X Villa said great question and then gave a point up. Okay. Uh, we got, uh, a question for both of you were both of you nervous for your pro debut. Like just not the debut, but playing in front of a lot of fans and showcasing your skills in front of everybody.
Quincy Amarikwa (40:06):
You want to take that one?
Quincy Amarikwa (40:07):
Oh, uh, yeah. Okay. I guess for me, I wasn't nervous. Right? Like I was like about time. Geez. Let's see. Let me show what, like if I'm being honest, right. And that mentality has served me well in many ways, but it's also not helped me and others. And I think, you know, this show and what we've been doing on the platform for us, I mean, we've been doing the [inaudible] for like two years now has been hopefully sharing with the audience, you know, the ways in which the mentality is very helpful and beneficial, but also the ways in which it's, uh, it doesn't necessarily help you. Right? Like your greatest strength can become your greatest weakness and self-reflection is definitely a strong part of the process. But yeah, in my debut, no, I wasn't nervous. It was just more like, yeah, I, you know, I know the work I've done to be here. Uh, I'm ready to show what I've got and uh, you know, no looking back in terms of like, let's make it happen now. Um, I learned plenty of experiences from, from over the course of my career, the person who that way, but yeah, that was my, my debut. How, uh, how about you?
Quincy Amarikwa (41:22):
Uh, I feel like, um, in Switzerland it was a little different because I mean, we don't really have that many fans, but then with the rain, we didn't really have fans cause it was COVID. Um, so I feel like my mentality I have in like the nerves are there, regardless of like who's watching, it's kinda just me like getting anxious to get out there and like prove to everybody that like, you know, like to like just have it up. I don't know. So, um, yeah. It's interesting. It's interesting. Um, uh, mixed emotions, definitely.
Quincy Amarikwa (42:04):
Okay. Um, all right. So what, what are you most looking forward to kind of like maybe in your career post-career like on the field, off the field? Like what, what are, what, what motivates you right now? Like what are you, what are you, what are you most passionate about? Um, if it's soccer and soccer or if it's soccer and something else, like what, what, what gets you going? Yeah.
Quincy Amarikwa (42:31):
Um, I mean just competition in general. Like I live for it. I love it. So
Quincy Amarikwa (42:40):
I language over here,
Quincy Amarikwa (42:47):
Winning competition. Like I could, after this, I could see myself doing other pro sports and like trying to compete and like pivoting outside of soccer, just cause I love to win and love being athletic. Um, but then outside of that realm, like I do have like a Tamer side. Um, that's all about winning too.
Quincy Amarikwa (43:12):
That's okay. Professional sports that's okay. We get it. That's what I said. Okay. Uh, on the Tamer side, the nerd side. Right. Other, other aspects of personality, uh, what, what motivates you? What are you passionate about? Like winning off the field. Yeah.
Quincy Amarikwa (43:30):
Yeah. Definitely just like impacting others, marginalized groups, black and Brown people. Um, you know, like I'm studying for the LSAT, so hopefully I can be a lawyer and get into like public interest and, um, do something in that sphere. So definitely, um, you know, like want to empower people in like, you know, create equity and, you know, equality and, um, help people too.
Quincy Amarikwa (44:05):
Uh, no, uh, I, um, I guess over the, of the course of my career and I'm sure as you've started to learn as well to you, like the amount of impact you can have on, you know, the, the next generation of just humans is, uh, is something that you, you learn more and more about as your career progresses. And it's, it's great to see. It's great to see you looking for ways to, to share your experiences, share, you know, what you've learned along the way, but also maintaining the competitive nature and spirit because that's, that's, you know, that's important, that's, that's good, that's necessary, that's needed. And, um, you know, I love that aspect of it. I think, you know, last week, uh, Serena, my wife was on the Assa soccer pro show. Right. And we were talking about basically the competitive nature of our relationship and just, just so she had ran a track professionally, right.
Quincy Amarikwa (45:10):
And we'd met at a UC Davis together and she wants to win just as bad, you know? So even when you say, Hey competition, w I said, yo, you speaking, you speak in the language, love that. Uh, so I, I always, I love to bring attention to that because I don't necessarily think, you know, having that competitive spirit and nature being a player of color is always looked at in a positive light and in the ways in which it should be received, those are valuable assets. Those are valuable, uh, pieces of an organization. And, um, I always want to continue to speak to that cause I think it's, I think it's amazing and I, I, uh, I appreciate your approach and I appreciate your mentality and I definitely appreciate, uh, your willingness to, to be up at one in the morning to join the show that that's gotta be definitely the first for sure. Um, uh, cause I know we're winding down on time here and I want to be mindful of your time, uh, was before, you know, kind of, we wrap it up. Was there, was there anything in particular, uh, you wanted to, to speak about, uh, bring attention to, or any questions you've got for me? Um, kind of fours, yours, whatever, whatever that's for you
Quincy Amarikwa (46:35):
Put me in the hot seat. Um, Uh, like how are you, um, being in the like men's MLS, like connecting with women and like, how do you, cause I know you brought on a few like black women in the past couple of weeks and like, how was that for you? And like, what are you, um, like, you know, like trying to do to like kind of bring both leagues together.
Quincy Amarikwa (47:10):
Okay. Talk about hot seat, huh. Um, so it's, uh, it depends on where you want to start with it, right? So I'm the eldest and only boy of four. So I've got three younger sisters, right. So learning how to survive in a, in a, in a black female household was a skill I had to learn early on. Right. So, uh, so that's kind of one aspect. And more importantly, when you go out into the world and you see how people perceive you, as well as they, how they may perceive your sisters and, and you know, your father and your mother. So I'm biracial, my mother's from superior Montana. And my father's from awaring, Nigeria, you, you learn, you learn the rules as they apply to you and they don't necessarily apply to everybody else. And I don't necessarily, I understand the system has to work somehow.
Quincy Amarikwa (48:10):
Right. But it doesn't necessarily mean kind of what you're talking about before it's equitable and a pleasant experience for everyone. And you know, those experiences early on in life probably weighed very heavily on me in terms of my approach over the course of my career and figuring out ways in which I can hopefully be like an interpreter of explaining like, Hey look like, just because it's good for you doesn't mean it's good for them. And also vice versa. And, but at the end of the day, we're all in it together. And, and it can be difficult to have conversations when you feel like you don't know enough or you feel like you made too many mistakes. And, and the goal in my mind is to create safe spaces where we can connect. We can learn, like even I kicked off the call by mispronouncing your name and then saying it again, later you get what I'm saying.
Quincy Amarikwa (49:06):
Like I lean into my mistakes. I don't even point attention to them because I want people to go, yes, I made a mistake. I acknowledge it. So I made multiple six. Right. But it still doesn't mean that we can't learn from them. We can't grow together. And what are people's intentions? Like where, what, what's their aura, what's their vibe, you know, like, um, and I've just met so many great people over the course of my career, on the men's side, on the women's side that I'm going, like, yo people need to know about these people, right? They need to know these stories and they need to hear them from their perspective, from their voice, not, you know, that I already have an idea as to what the story needs to be. And I'm coming in to get a quote to fit you into whatever predefined box.
Quincy Amarikwa (49:58):
Right. I'm not, I don't subscribe to that. I'm not, I don't, I don't, I don't enjoy that. I'm not down for that. And um, I feel like a lot of people want to be able to have that space, but didn't necessarily know how to do it or engage. So that's my, you know, that's not perfect. I appreciate the question because it's just like, that's what I'm hoping we're creating here. And that's why I'm really excited about just like our conversation and you and, and, um, you know, yeah. That's, that's, that's it, um, I'll put you back on the hot seat, so yeah. Put you back on Nazi. Well now, because I definitely want to know, uh, I want to make sure that, you know, how best can people follow you, right. How best can people stay up to date on your story what's going on in your world? And, um, yeah, no, no, all things that you're obviously that you're willing to share that you want it to be pretty to know about. Right.
Quincy Amarikwa (51:06):
Well, Instagram is a great way to stay connected, so okay. At murder she wrote that's my handle. Um, and, um, posted about soccer, posted about what's going on in the world. Um, so, uh, yeah. Get a little bit of like all the different bits, little bits of what's going on in my head. And, um, yeah, I guess even just following women's sports, even outside of soccer and women's sports, um, were a lot of cool things are happening, um, just in the, this sports sphere. Um, and, um, I know a lot of people have sisters and daughters and cousins and young girls that they know and, um, like ask yourself, would you want them to grow up in this same situation that, you know, in the current climate, like, would you want, you know, like today the NCAA you saw the disparity between the woman's in the men's weight room for the tournament, like, what do you want your daughter to go to the tournament after, you know, putting in all those hours and to have two dumbbells and a yoga mat, or would you want them to go and like have the full experience and be able to lift weights over there and train and prepare their bodies and go out there and kill it.
Quincy Amarikwa (52:34):
Like, I think just being empathetic and, um, that'll go a long way, you know?
Quincy Amarikwa (52:43):
Awesome. No, I love that. So we're, we will stay up to date on your journey through Instagram, we'll be on the lookout for your, your bar score, right? So like when you pass the bar, when you become a lawyer, right. Um, I'm gonna need some, uh, um, you know, uh, legal counsel sometime in the future. So, uh, we'll be on the lookout for that. And, uh, any other, any, and all other initiatives and stuff that I know you'll get into as, as you kind of progress in your career. I, I really appreciate you taking the time to come and, you know, uh, wrap with us and vibe with us, uh, and tune in. And, um, we definitely will have to link here again in the future and kind of get a, get an update as to you how things are going and, uh, good, good luck obviously on the season, happy to hear that, you know, you're back to training and stuff, so, yeah.
Quincy Amarikwa (53:38):
Yeah. Thanks for having me. This was awesome. Um, and yeah, I loved it. Great experience. All right. Okay. Take care.
Quincy Amarikwa (53:58):
Okay. All right. Oh, there we go. All right. That's a wrap. I'm seeing everybody spam that hard button. Thank you very much for joining in, um, uh, ex villas. Thank you. Good luck. Plug Virginia said, uh, another great episode down flames with diamond, your head emoji. Uh, Liam had said, love it, guys all the best. Uh, I see one five, six, seven, nine, six headset. Thank you. Thank you so much for joining in, um, Pat leaves that, uh, Mariah, uh, murder, she wrote, uh, Joe Jackson said, love this live. Thank you both have a great week and said they had just followed. So I love that. So everybody, uh, like she had mentioned, go ahead and give her a follow on Instagram. If you want to stay up to date as to what is going on, um, and big shout out and thanks again for joining in and for everybody, for tuning in, um, the replay, we're still working on getting all the replays together, um, and like a publishing schedule because these episodes are high level and we want to make sure we're getting the Infor the information out, but we also want to reward those of you who are joining in live and participating.
Quincy Amarikwa (55:17):
So, um, I think most of the replays will start coming on a much larger delay, you know, like two or three weeks. So if you're not able to join in on the live, you might have to wait a couple of weeks before you actually get to listen to the replay. Um, so I want to continue to encourage everyone to continue to keep turning in life as always. And, um, perfect soccer podcast was just out this, this Monday. Ooh. Replay of think of episode one Oh four, not a lot of stuff. So yeah, for those of you who, um, are wanting to keep up to date on everything, make sure you join the email list. And I will see everybody here next week, same time, same place. And as always, you guys know what it is. I mean, you had.